86 responses to “Ultimate Bad Ass Round 1: Jack Bauer Bracket”

  1. Jason

    This is going to be a good one.

  2. Cap'n Schwartz

    OMG how fun is this!?!?!
    They specifically need to make a 24 episode of Jack slappin around McGuyver….

    Although Riggs is cool..he’s not Taking Chan…

    Linus, I’m afraid thinks he feels lucky…Harry in this one..

    Just seeing the Matrix vs Kirk contest cracks me up!! Kirk has a phaser and double clasp back blast shot, Matrix..has everything else… nod to the commando…I mean come on he has to win, you see the kind of sandwiches this guy eats?

  3. Cap'n Schwartz

    Yeah but you wear glasses, so you have an excuse to not be able to see it…

  4. jina

    Can you imagine McGruber… I mean MacGuyver trying to build something out of paper clips and duct tape while Jack Bauer beats the tar out of him.

    Great contest!

  5. Cap'n Schwartz

    I just see as Kirk is pausing in his melo-dramitc speech, he gets punched in the face…

  6. Kory

    In honor of Michael Buffer…

    “Let’s get ready to RUMBLE…”

  7. Cap'n Schwartz

    @Kory LOL…

  8. Kory

    What even funnier is Buffer has his own web page.

    I couldn’t recall his last name so i did quick search and up comes http://www.letsrumble.com – Go figure.

  9. Jason

    @Kory – So completely random it’s funny.

    Yeah, I like Kirk too, but no way he’s taking down The Commando! Unless…Kirk gets close enough to break out the Vulcan Death Grip…

    Still, The Commando use machine guns and like bazookas and stuff… Kirk’s gonna have a hard time in his fancy pantsuit.

  10. Cap'n Schwartz

    Did you know Buffer charges like $100k for an appearance to say his famous saying… he even has it trade marked….

  11. R.A. Porter

    Kirk has the advantage in his corner.
    - Bones gives him a shot of tri-ox compound
    - Spock calls out completely logical attack moves
    - Scotty stands at the ready at the transporter
    - Checkov mans the weapons station
    - Sulu has the Conn
    - and, Yeoman Rand has a clipboard for no conceivable purpose

    R.A. Porter’s last blog post..Friday Night Sketch War: Round Ten

  12. Robert

    James T. Kirk’s best weapon was not the Vulcan Death Grip (which apparently only puts people to sleep?) but the aptly named (because I named it) “Jim Kirk”, which is the double clasped hammer fist technique. That said, John Matrix is pretty cool, and he can kill hundreds of people (I seem to recall it being about 120?) in a relatively short time, without needing a starship to do it with. I’m a bit conflicted here.

    Ben and McGyver really had no chance in this lineup at all. Neither is a badass.

  13. JReeves

    Ben can convince Dirty Harry to shoot himself.

  14. Robert

    Dirty Harry is no weak-willed weenie full of problems and angst, so I’m going to have to respectfully disagree. Ben won’t be able to convince him of anything, especially not with his head blown clean off.

  15. Kory

    @ Robert – I’m with you on this. I simply do not see Dirty Harry willing to listen to what Ben has to say.

  16. Scotty Dub

    Seriously why is Ben Linus in this?

    Scotty Dub’s last blog post..The Art and Anguish of the Presentation

  17. Scotty Dub

    Definitely for the bad guys bracket, esp in light of the fact that Jules isn’t going to get in. so not happy. :-(

    Scotty Dub’s last blog post..The Art and Anguish of the Presentation

  18. Jason

    I would have to say Jules is a bigger bad ass than Linus.

  19. Cap'n Schwartz

    Linus? The guy with the blanket from the Peanuts? That dude is lightening with that blankey…

  20. nicky

    hey! did someone sabotage my voting b/c i can’t vote!! it’s already showing the results for me. WAAAAAHHHH!
    and you know who i thought we forgot? tony soprano. he’s more bad ass than ben linus too.
    HELP MIKE!

    nicky’s last blog post..Beauty wants.

  21. Cap'n Schwartz

    Yeah we decided Riddick could take both Mr. T and Jules wiht one hand, so we replaced them both… :)

  22. nicky

    so i had to do a absentee ballot since adrian already voted from our home IP. he voted for me at his work.
    and i did give macgyver a vote b/c i felt bad for him. :) he has no chance. but mr. t does!!!

    nicky’s last blog post..Beauty wants.

  23. Steven

    Riggs, Riggs, Riggs, Riggs!! The guy took like 10 bullets at the end of Lethal Weapon 2 and survived, can dislocate his shoulder at will, and had who knows how many “at bats” with Patsy Kensit as well. I could go on and on. Come on people!

    Steven’s last blog post..Don’t Agitate The Dots

  24. Cap'n Schwartz

    Dont get me wrong I’m a huge Kirk fan (I mean come on he’s a Capn for crying out loud), I just dont see him taking Mr. Matrix…

  25. Cap'n Schwartz

    5 Votes? walk in the park… Ole Matrix hasnt even gotten up yet!!!

  26. Kory

    Still early but Mr. Special Forces is starting to close the gap.

  27. Jason

    The Commando is only behind by three now. Looks like he could catch up. Kirk just doesn’t have the stamina to go against a commando.

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  29. Cap'n Schwartz

    Commando was just on the action channel… lol, no way my fellow Capn could win this…

  30. Cap'n Schwartz

    Ok , so much for the Kirk 3 vote lead, he certainly ‘warped’ ahead now…

  31. Kory

    So much for Mr. Special Forces closing the gap…

  32. Cap'n Schwartz

    Yeah, bummer man, I think Kirk is more of a household name… but maybe we dont know something others do??!?!..

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  34. mright

    ben linus…….get the fuck out…that dude is brilliant…he can win over everyone.

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