I was sent this little gem by Richard, one of our guest writers here, and I totally loved it, so of course I’m passing it on to you.
What we have here is an “unused” teleplay for the original pilot to Lost, written by Andrew Bridgman.
Of course, it’s sort of what Lost might be like if it were a comedy. Here is an excerpt from the first few lines of it:
JACK: OK, everyone, gather round. I’m Jack. We crashed on this island. I’m kind of an alcoholic, and I had a really complicated relationship with my father, Christian, who was also an alcoholic.
CLAIRE: Christian Shepherd? That’s my dad, too!
JACK: No way!
SAWYER: Oh, yeah, I know that guy, too. I met him at a bar. He’s proud of you.
JACK: You met my dad?
SAWYER: Yeah, I met him right before I killed this guy I thought had ruined my life as a child. He was a con man who went by “Sawyer” and had an affair with my mother and then my dad found out and killed her and himself. It was ugly.
LOCKE: No way! That sounds just like my dad! He stole my kidney and then paralyzed me.
KATE: Paralyzed people can’t walk.
LOCKE: Don’t tell me what I can’t do! I can walk now, obviously. I think this island is magic or something crazy like that.
Now, you must go finish reading it over on McSweeney’s site. One of the most clever, funniest things I’ve read in awhile.

ROTFL – that is extremely funny – one of the best things I’ve read in awhile.
The Trousered Apes last blog post..Who was Jesus of Nazareth? Parts 5 thru 10 of 10 with Dr. Craig
Yeah, I totally enjoyed it…very original.
Well that cleared up a few things for me.